


DNA.

by Icefire87



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, DNA, Declarations Of Love, Friendship/Love, Heavy Angst, I'm Sorry, Kidnapping, Letters, Love Confessions, Love Letters, M/M, Regret, Sad, Sad Ending, Sad and Beautiful, Short, Stay safe out there, probably my most angsty writing, read carefully
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:27:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22330324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Icefire87/pseuds/Icefire87
Summary: His decline.
Relationships: Niall Horan/Harry Styles
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	1. I.

The paper was neatly folded and it read:  
14-July-2012  
“Louis suggested I do this. So, I’m going to write letters to you until you come back. He’s noticed how anxious I’ve been without you here. I know you’ve only been gone about 50 hours… It's still worrying. You’re out there somewhere, I just know it. You’ll come home. The police are starting to look for you. When you get home, I’ll bake you that sweet cake I know you love. I just hope it's soon.  
Written in my DNA.  
-Harry”

The paper was written in sloppy black ink, but it read:  
15-July-2012  
“More time has passed, but no one’s found any sign of you. Niall, how did you manage this? You’re probably just playing a joke on me. It’s not really funny. Come on, come back, we’re waiting for you. We can’t plan our tours without you. No one’s taking it well. Just please, show up at my door. Or answer me… do something. I think Zayn’s taking it the worst. He’s very aggressive. I honestly sometimes don’t want to talk to him. I know you're coming back, so I’ve been taking it the easiest. Liam’s just gotten quiet, it’s not normal. You’re out there somewhere. There’s so much I want to say to you when you get back, I really hope I get the chance to.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was creased several times, and it read:  
17-July-2012  
“Your mom came to visit us. She started crying. She’s terrified about what’s happened to you. Honestly, I am too. I can’t stop thinking about you. I’ve been doing anything I can to distract myself. I know it's not a joke anymore, but please, please Niall. Come back. I think Louis is drinking again. I don’t want to lose a dear friend. Especially before I got the opportunity to tell you how I felt. I’ve liked you since the day I first met you. I can’t lose you. You’re coming home. I don’t care what anyone says. I know you are. Please let me be right.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was slightly water damaged, but it read:  
18-July-2012  
“Why is it so hard without you? Zayn got into a fight last night with someone. He’s refusing to talk about it. He has a black eye and several bruises on his arms and chest. Someone said something about you, and it set him off. We haven’t got any new songs written. You’re all over the news at this point. A ‘kidnapped popstar’. That’s all they're calling you. I don’t know why but it hurts me to see it. Who would do that? I hope you’re not being hurt or abused. That’s my greatest fear. You’re going to come home and they will have taken you away. I want to hold you, I’d give anything for that right now. Anything to just see you alive and well. I’m sorry about what I said. I didn’t mean to yell at you. I never thought a small argument could be my greatest regret.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was hardly folded and it read:  
20-July-2012  
“I’m starting to hate everything. I don’t think I can trust people anymore. If someone took you away, then who can I trust? What can I do? Liam calls it paranoia, maybe it is. I’ve been forgetting things lately. I showed up an hour late to the recording studio because I thought we were starting at 2. Lucky for me, no one was mad. I don’t know if I can keep singing without you. I swear I can hear your voice. It gets hard to talk sometimes. Especially when you get brought up in conversation. I know I haven't known you for more than a year or so but you mean a lot to me. Since the day we first met. You’re so cute and precious. You are a light in my life. You know, I’ve been thinking about going to some sort of therapy or doctor, maybe they can help me. But you can the most. It's been 8 days and they’ve found a few signs of you. It makes me hopeful. The initial shock is starting to wear off. I think Zayn’s calmed down. Liam is starting to use his voice again. I think Louis is still drinking though. I don’t know how to help him, I won’t lie, I think about it sometimes. An escape would be nice. I’ve been using this as such. Maybe I should get a journal instead of writing on notebook paper.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”


	2. II.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His decline.

The paper was roughly folded but it read:  
22-July-2012  
“Great news. The police think they have an idea of what happened. They think they can find you by the end of the month. These notes are really helping. Liam saw me writing this one and I had to run to another room. I don’t think I’m comfortable with any of them knowing. I’m going to be okay though. I just know it. We’re going to find you. On that note, I had a small issue with him. We were talking and he said he was worried about my mental health. I didn’t understand why. I mentioned I’d been considering getting a professional and he strongly encouraged it. Have I been acting weird? I think I'm okay. Or I'm going to be. When you get here, I will be. I know it.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry"

The paper was crinkled and it read:  
25-July-2012  
“I took Liam’s advice and met with a professional yesterday. I don’t like using the word therapist… makes me feel messed up in the head. People are starting to say you’re dead. I just chuckle when they do. They don’t know what they're talking about. I know you’re out there. Louis got really drunk last night. He stumbled up to my house, I’m really worried about him. If you were here you could make him feel better. I was trying to comfort him, and he offered me some beer. It’s bad, I know, I know, I’m 17. Still. I told him about these letters and he seemed happy that I was dealing with it. He knows how I feel about you Ni. I hope that’s okay. He gave me a little hug and we kept talking. The police have made even more progress. They found what they think was your watch. Things are getting better every day. I wrote a song about you, I think I might show it to the boys tomorrow. Well, I started to anyway.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was slightly torn but it read:  
29-July-2012  
“Everyone hates me right now. Everyone but Louis. I haven’t had the energy to write to you these past 3 days. Zayn found my letters and snapped at me. I don’t know why he was so mad, all I know is that he thought it was childish and he said I was just making things harder for him. I didn’t understand, but I didn’t know what else to say. What can you say to that? They got me on antidepressants, and I took an extra dose today, it's the only thing that gave me the energy to get up right now. Liam got mad at me when I didn’t show up yesterday. I forgot we even were meeting. I just slept through the whole thing. I’ve been sleeping a lot more lately. Sometimes I dream of you. Things are getting worse. I feel like I'm fighting for my life. It’s a war, I think I’m losing. I also got mad at my therapist the girl who’s trying to help me. She said maybe I needed to think you were actually gone from my life. She’s crazy. I know you're coming back. At least Louis is still being nice to me. I think he’s started to slow down on the drinks lately. So I guess there's something good here.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was smeared with red and it read:  
30-July-2012  
“I threw up today. Taking the extra pills was a bad idea, I feel terrible. I saw you in my dream last night. We’d finally gotten to go on a nice dinner together. The room was lit up by candlelight, and you said you loved it more than anything. If you come back, that’s what we’ll do. We’ll go somewhere special like that. I promise you... I’m not coping well, I’m sorry. I’m starting to believe them. What if you’re really gone? I’ll keep writing these notes in candlelight… It makes me feel like I could turn around and see you here.  
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was unfolded but it read:  
31-July-2012  
“Zayn apologised. He said sorry, and then he invited me and Louis and we all smoked something nice. I’m sorry, I know you don’t like this. I know, I know. I forgot how sad I was for a little while. I don’t blame you, none of this is your fault. I’d love to see you. I love you. I wish I’d gotten to say that. You’re really beautiful. I hope you know that wherever you are. Perfect in every way. I know you're out there. I’m going to look for you. I don’t know why I’ve waited this long to try to. I think I really am messed up. I’m going to find you and this dark almost 3 weeks are going to be over. I’m writing by candlelight. I hope you appreciate it. I’m also still a little high.  
Written in my DNA  
-Haz”


	3. III.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His decline.

The paper was scented strongly and it read:  
1-Aug-2012  
“I messed up. I don’t even know where to go. I wasted a day of my life driving up and down streets. I’ve given up trying to hide these letters. Louis is here while I’m writing and he spilled some of his drink on the paper. Kind of funny if you ask me. I think I’m doing better. I want you to come home. It’s something I need at this point. The thought that you might show up on my doorstep is sometimes all I have to get me out of bed. I hope you never see these, I’m not this obsessive in the real world.   
Written in my DNA  
-Harry”

The paper was smeared and damaged but it read:  
4-Aug-2012  
“Niall. Niall. Niall…”

The paper’s corner was ripped off and it read:  
4-Aug-2012  
“No. They told me... They found your body. Niall… I am sure you can see this from where you are… Please, please know I love you more than anything. Ni. I wish I’d told you. That’s my only regret. I’m wearing your watch. I hope thats okay.  
Engraved in my DNA  
-Harry.”

The paper was covered in tears but it read:  
5-Aug-2012  
“Louis drank a lot last night. I was worried hed get poisoned from it. He’s lucky. You’re not though. I hate myself. Why did my last words to you have to be anger and hate? Wherever you are… I’m sorry. I’d do anything to bring you back. I don’t think I want to breathe anymore…  
All that’s left of my DNA  
-Harry Styles.”

The paper was singed at the edges but it read:  
6-Aug-2012  
"Im sorry. im sorry Niall. I can't anymore. Someone showed me a picture. Is it wrong to say youre still beautiful? Even looking like that... I'm writing by candlelight, just like you asked. I’m going to see you, more than in my dreams… knowing you're gone chokes me tighter than any rope ever could.  
Do Not Answer.

-H”


End file.
